Monday, April 13, 2009

I choose you

It’s a funny thing, this love/co-parenting relationship. I don’t know about you, but for me, it’s where all of my uglies come out.
If I’m having a challenging moment, I blame my mate. If several challenging moments pile up, I consider fleeing. Ridiculous. Yet repetitive enough that I need a new way of looking at all this.

So, here it is.
“You cannot disappoint me.”
If I am looking at my children that way, why not also look at my partner this way. He is just being him, doing the things that I fell in love with in the first place, such as skiing. Often. I remind myself, there is nothing wrong with that. I want him to be happy and do what he loves.

“This is THE love affair of this life.”
So, if I choose to believe that, which I do, then ACT LIKE IT, dammit. Treat him with real consideration and care. Embrace all of who he is, especially the parts that drive me nuts (neon sign pointing at places where I need to grow up).

And finally,
“This too shall pass.”
It will. One of us will die, something will happen, because everything in this world of form is temporary. One day we will not be together like this. It could be today, so let’s kiss good-bye when you leave in the morning. What if it is the last time?

We don’t have to wait until the kids go to bed to connect. We can connect in any moment we want, and that is so important for them to see. We don’t have to wait until the kids grow up so we can DO stuff together (like ski) to feel close. Let’s feel close now, even when our lives seem so different.

Feeling close requires opening my heart and letting go. It has nothing to do with changing you or wishing something was different. It is my choice, my work.

I choose you. Over and over.

This was found thanks to Theresa and composed by NPC

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